Beautiful Women Who are Unloved and Abandoned

Beautiful Women Who are Unloved and Abandoned

By Thinking P'Noy   10:54 AM   No comments :

Have you heard of some beautiful women having no husband, single moms and unloved, whereas the less attractive ones more loved and having families to call their own? They said that love relationship is about compatibility and happiness that those gifted with good looks don't have the real sense of humility to offer in helping build the marital union. As regards marriage, most beauties are happier as a towering corporate personality than as a wife. For most men prefer a long lasting relationship and partnership, which is more than the lifespan of beauty---more than what most beautiful women desire to achieve in life.

 

They said that love relationship is about compatibility and happiness that those gifted with good looks don't have the real sense of humility to offer in helping build the marital union. As regards marriage, most beauties are happier as a towering corporate personality than as a wife.

 

Beautiful Women Are Seduced and Conquered By Irresponsible Men

They say that we need not make generalizations for there are beautiful women who are also successful as career persons, mothers, and wives. But let's face it: the more attractive the woman, the more the admirers and the possibility of choosing the wrong man. In fairness, I came across a blog that seemed to put the blame on the men in trying to defend the failures of most beautiful women. The author said that "The more attractive the woman, the more likely she will be approached by the kind of man who approaches attractive women. This kind of man views hunting, seducing and conquering women as sport."

Well said. But our concern is the ability of the beautiful women to be loved honestly irrespective of the admirers.

Beautiful Women Need to Understand
the Dynamics of a Healthy Marital Union

My thesis is that most beautiful women don't understand the dynamics of man-woman (or husband-wife) relationship. What is it?

They demand value for their beauty, just like selling something that's of high quality. "If you love me," demands Miss Beautiful, "you must provide me all my wants. After all, "I have beauty, not all have."

Well, such an attitude is acceptable, for behind the success of most women lies beauty, good looks, pleasing personality! But as regards the marital union, most beauties are happier as an employee than as a wife. Sad that most of them don't understand that majority of men marry for the sake of life partnership, and not in a sense of a home decor.

Beautiful Women Tend to Ignore Character Building

Yes, what would life partnership look like, for example, when Miss Beautiful requires her man to worship her good looks and loveliness? With all the natural gifts of most movie female superstars---their acting, singing, good looks, popularity---only a handful of them landed a real marriage, and only by sacrificing their career.

Have you heard of this expression: "I buried two husbands already!" It is coming from the widows (mostly old and losing any trace of good looks already!) who understand man's love better than most failed-in-marriage celebrities.

Man's love, I mean the love of a responsible and mature man, is always anchored on life partnership. Marrying a woman for the sake of beauty, so they say, is just like buying a mobile phone because of the color.

Most successful wives, the Leni Robredo type, never demand value of their beauty more than their character and inner loveliness.

If your wife is so beautiful and exceptional as a life partner, then you're a lucky person, like the man winning the lotto jackpot! Just don't look back on her past if she had a bad one!

My straightforward and unsolicited advice to the beautiful women who failed in marriage is this:

"'Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.bFor the husband is the head of the wife.' 'Then the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him."'" (Eph. 5:22-23a; Gen. 2:18)

Why is it that most beautiful women are single moms, abandoned wives, or divorcees, whereas the less attractive ones have men beside them who are willing to die in the name of their love? Well, it is because Miss Beautiful is demanding too much value on her beauty, and less value on her character.

Character contributes to beauty. It fortifies a woman as her youth fades. A mode of conduct, a standard of courage, discipline, fortitude, and integrity can do a great deal to make a woman beautiful. -- Jacqueline Bisset

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Kindness Bartered with Kindness is Manipulative

Kindness Bartered with Kindness is Manipulative

By Thinking P'Noy   4:21 PM   No comments :

 

Kindness Bartered is Manipulative Kindness

True kindness doesn’t expect to be reciprocated. Kindness is defined as the tendency of being forgiving or the "quality of being warmhearted and considerate and humane and sympathetic." Therefore, a form of kindness that's expecting a reward or a reciprocal attitude from whom one's kindness was tendered is deceptive and manipulative. For kindness is to be nice to others, free of any ulterior motives at all---no strings attached. Someone has well said that: "It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice."

Therefore, a form of kindness that's expecting a reward or a reciprocal attitude from whom one's kindness was tendered is deceptive and manipulative. For kindness is to be nice to others, free of any ulterior motives at all---no strings attached. Someone has well said that: "It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice."

A Kindness Given in Exchange
for Personal Reward, Advantage, and Gratification

There's a story in the Bible where a certain woman built a room for Prophet Elisha (2 Kings 4:8-17). Pleased, Elisha prayed that the notable but childless Shunammite woman would bear a son. Using this illustration, one preacher ventured to say that: one's kindness will always be rewarded. He also added that a glass of cold water given in kindness will receive a reward, quoting Matthew 10:40-42:

"He who receives you receives Me, and he who receives Me receives Him who sent Me. He who receives a prophet in the name of a prophet shall receive a prophet's reward; and he who receives a righteous man in the name of a righteous man shall receive a righteous man's reward. And whoever in the name of a disciple gives to one of these little ones even a cup of cold water to drink, truly I say to you, he shall not lose his reward." (Matthew 10:40-42)

Now, who would dare to disagree with the above verses which fell from the lips of Christ Himself? Well, Jesus Christ is the Truth. (John 14:6). No one can twist the Biblical truth that "God is not mocked; a man reaps what he sows"! Outside of Christ or the Christian faith for that matter however, the virtue of kindness or being nice to people, is usually applied differently. We normally are nice only if we have a personal interest on the recipient or the results of our kindness. "An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth" seems to be the norm in our relationships!

Be Kind Without Expecting Any Form of Reward

Outside of Christ or the Christian faith for that matter however, the virtue of kindness or being nice to people, is usually applied differently. We normally are nice only if we have a personal interest on the recipient or the results of our kindness. "An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth" seems to be the norm in our relationships!

Charles H. Spurgeon once said: "A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on marble." I think Spurgeon is right: we need to be kind without expecting any form of reward, for the truest reward or payment of our kindness is the happy remembrance of our good character by the people affected by our benignity.

Christian Kindness Toward Christian Leaders

I do personally believe, however, that one's kindness given to the real leaders and the true Christian Church as well will always receive a reward from the Lord, either physically, spiritually, or even financially or all three divine blessings at once. Jesus Christ taught it; I experienced it: I experienced where all that I had was burned (my computer, books, everything) to ashes! But my faith in Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior was authentic as ever despite my severe trials; I knew that He loved me and bled and died for my sins. (Now I have a laptop already for me to be able to share my story so easily). "Delight thyself also in the LORD"; yes, amidst the storms of trials, "and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart." Psalm 37:4.

Charles H. Spurgeon once said: "A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on marble." I think Spurgeon is right: we need to be kind without expecting any form of reward, for the truest reward or payment of our kindness is the happy remembrance of our good character by the people affected by our benignity.

Kindness Attracts Kindness

Kindness, outside of the Christian paradigm, has another meaning. We are living in this "me-first" world, and being kind the way Christ was while He was still walking on this planet over 2,000 years ago, has now become a strange phenomenon to the majority. For we understand kindness today to be always connected to our personal interest. The politicians, in particular, have coined this great description of their so-called kindness (not all of them, though!): "There's no such thing as permanent friendship, only permanent interest."

A confident public speaker started his speech by saying: "When God created the universe He created universal laws and one of these laws is the law of attraction." Well said. Kindness attracts kindness, in short. The Bible is full of instructions about patience and kindness, which are relevant even to this Bible-less generation of ours.

God’s Kindness Attracts Repentance

After all, the kindness of God will lead people to repent, wrote the Apostle Paul. Her mother's sympathies may change the wicked and disobedient daughter. Here's how Paul said it:

"So when you, a mere man, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God's judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance, and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance?" ( Romans 2:3-4 )

CONCLUSION

Let's go now to the bottom line of it all: some people are naturally kind to others, they be Christians or not, some of their names are even in the Guinness Book. They are so few, though. Would you include Mahatma Gandhi or Buddha or Mother Teresa in your list of genuinely kind people? Or, do you believe they did what they did, yes, to thousands of individuals, without expecting any personal gratification in the process? You have your answer, of course.

Quotes

This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness. - Dalai Lama

But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil.- Jesus Christ (Luke 6:35)

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Filipino Culture Strengths and Weaknesses

Filipino Culture Strengths and Weaknesses

By Thinking P'Noy   9:07 AM   No comments :

The Filipino Culture

Like all other nations on earth, our Filipino culture or way of life as a people has both strengths and weaknesses. Culture, says the dictionary is "the arts and other manifestations of human intellectual achievement regarded collectively...The tastes in art and manners that are favored by a social group...All the knowledge and values shared by a society."

Tradition, on the other hand, is "the transmission of customs or beliefs from generation to generation, or the fact of being passed on in this way." Culture and tradition thus is a way of life, the practices of our people during a burial rite, a wedding ceremony or the way we view and see things in life.

Why is it that there are many retired foreigners, particularly Americans, who want to live and die in the Philippines? It is because we value close family ties. Call it as emotionalism or sentimentalism, but we simply love to see our children and grandchildren, even our in-laws, live harmoniously with us under the same roof as much as possible.

The Chinese people are governed by Feng Shui in their construction of buildings, for example, or in starting a business. It is a "Chinese philosophical system of harmonizing the human existence with the surrounding environment." The term feng shui literally translates as "wind-water" in English.

Our counterpart to Feng Shui in the Philippines is the belief in the involvement of the spirits of our ancestors in our daily life. All these practices and belief system are handed down to us by culture and tradition, which is the transmitted knowledge, customs, belief and values from generation to generation.

The Strengths of the Filipino Culture

Why is it that there are many retired foreigners, particularly Americans, who want to live and die in the Philippines? It is because we value close family ties. Call it as emotionalism or sentimentalism, but we simply love to see our children and grandchildren, even our in-laws, live harmoniously with us under the same roof as much as possible---finances permitting, of course.

The Americans on the other hand, believe in rugged individualism such as independence at age 18 and divorce as one accepted part of the culture. The result is that their elderly and grandparents found themselves without a family to call their own at the end of their life journey. We are not like them. That's why many of them came over to our shores, for they appreciate our Filipino culture of safeguarding and giving high value on our close family relationship.

We have other practices that are worth emulating. But we choose not to mention them all here as we need to understand also the weaknesses of the Filipino culture.

The Weaknesses of the Filipino Culture

The weaknesses of the Filipino culture seem to outweigh its strengths. For example, our culture of corruption in this country can be traceable back to our close family ties and sense of dependence on our elderly. As such, we have a feeling of complete reliance on our political leaders and boss---just as though they are our parents.

Another source of the problem of corruption is the teaching of the Catholic Church that triggers somehow the courage of most Filipinos to practice bribery. It is the teaching of establishing a connection with the patron-Saint through a feast or other form of offerings to get an imagined divine favor. We are taught, for example, to have some connection with our patron-Saints such as San Isidro Labrador or San Lorenzo Ruiz or a connection to Mother Mary, for her influence to Christ allegedly.

The strengths and weaknesses of the Filipino culture and tradition cannot be contained in just one brief article. Both the negative and the positive practices of the nations colonizing us for hundreds of years have also contributed to our ways of life.

Conclusion

In sum, I should say that it takes dozens, if not hundreds, of years yet to inculcate effectively into the minds of our people what is good and what is not. From the biblical standpoint, however, the evolution of a nation's culture and practices tends to "proceed from bad to worse." (cf. 2 Tim. 3:13) The recent pork barrel scam in the Philippines and the involvement of our brilliant leaders, including some highly respected media men who are enjoying national prominence, is one proof that great knowledge alone from the famous schools of learning is not enough to make a known Filipino leader corruption-proof.

The question is that if the well-educated is a crook, how much more the ordinary people in the streets given the same opportunity?

I like this quote from Theodore Roosevelt. It's good for all our corrupt Senators and Congressmen: “When they call the roll in the Senate, the Senators do not know whether to answer 'Present' or 'Not Guilty.'”

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